


This Year

by fitz-and-simmons (fitzandjemma)



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: AU, F/M, Song fic, University AU, music student au, musicians au, set in 2015
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-06
Updated: 2015-04-25
Packaged: 2018-03-10 19:53:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3301520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fitzandjemma/pseuds/fitz-and-simmons
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Musicians and university students, Leo Fitz and Jemma Simmons, meet in their second year. This story is their growing and changing relationship over the course of a year. Each month had its own chapter and each chapter had its own song. Named after the Mountain Goats song. I am not a musician, or at university so there will be many inaccuracies there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. January (This Year)

**Author's Note:**

> There will be many inaccuracies and I'm sorry!  
> Also this is my first FitzSimmons fic and my first on AO3 so bear with me.  
> Each chapter has a song and the one for January is This Year by The Mountain Goats. Please consider listening to it.  
> There are more notes at the end.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They meet in January and within the month they are already thick friends.

**January**

_I am going to make it through this year_  
 _ If it kills me _

Fitz’s voice fills the small music room, passionately, bitterly. He believes the words so hard, playing the same song over and over, his fingers strumming the guitar strings with such force that blisters are beginning to form.

He _has_ to make it through the rest of the year. And a bit after that. But bollocks, no need to think of that.

_I am going to make it through this year_  
 _If it kills me_

It's a Mountain Goats song he found recently but he decided to make the core message his new motto. The rest doesn’t make all that much sense to him but is strangely amusing. 

_A girl named Cathy wants a little of my time._

He has been there for just over an hour playing the same song over and over until his voice is straining and he is about to stop, when the door suddenly opens.

Fuck, he forgot to lock it. Although technically uni had not yet resumed and he had not expected anyone else to be here for a few days. The room was soundproof so this sudden intruder would not have heard him until she opened the door.

He recognised her from a few of his classes. She was stunningly beautiful and talented and had all of her shit together, hence he’d never plucked up the courage to speak to her. She already had friends anyway. It was their second year at university but Fitz had spent his first year in his home country Scotland. Well, he’d have to talk to her now.

“Oh! I’m sorry I didn’t realise anyone would be here!” She was as surprised as he was. She clearly wasn’t expecting anyone else to be here, if the black bobble hat over her greasy hair was anything to go by. He’d never seen her be anything but immaculately dressed and clean.

“No, no, it’s fine. I wasn’t doing anything important. I just don’t have anywhere else to be. I can leave if you want.” He awkwardly stood up and held the guitar by the neck to show that he was finishing up.   
  
“No, don’t leave on my account! I was just going to muck about a bit. Leo Fitz, right?”

“Yeah, transferred here from Scotland, beginning of the school year. People usually call me Fitz. Jemma Simmons, right?”

They started talking awkwardly about classes and teachers. She learnt that he had a very versatile voice and he liked all genres. He learnt that she played piano as well as violin and her voice was best suited for high sweet songs and pop, to her own annoyance. After 10 minutes she left, despite his protests.  

They didn’t see each other for a few days after that. But they remembered each other.

The next time they saw each other was the 5th, at their first History of Music class after the holidays had ended.

He awkwardly approached her as they waited in the classroom for the professor to arrive.

“Hey. Remember me?”  
  
“How could I forget!”

_And then Cathy showed up and we hung out_  
 _Trading swigs from a bottle, all bitter and clean_

During their fourth conversation, whilst discussing the music used to sum up the past year that had played on the BBC, their mutual love of Doctor Who was discovered.

“I thought it was good that they didn't just use music from 2014, but music that summed up 2014.”

“I know! Like the Kate Bush. Kate Bush did have a great tour tour this year, so it makes sense to play Wow even though it’s not recent.”  
  
“Plus they used the Doctor Who theme tune, to make it feel more British.”   
  
“I loved that. It was the Orbital remix wasn’t it?”

“Yeah… so… you like Doctor Who too?”

“You like Doctor Who too?”

They asked the question at the same time as each other. Giggling, Jemma nodded and they made plans to watch some together in Jemma’s dorm. Fitz wasn’t very well acquainted with Old Who, and she had enough box sets to collapse a shelf. She was cohabiting with a Communications student called Skye who wouldn’t mind her bringing someone over. It made sense.

After the first ‘Who-a-thon’ as Fitz dubbed it, they hung out a few more times. They liked each other’s company. They clicked.

Sometimes they practiced music together in a practice room or just in a dorm. On the 17th of January, Fitz was playing the song he had been playing when they had first met.

_Locking eyes, holding hands_  
 _Twin high maintenance machines_

“You really like that song, don’t you?”  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“You playing it when I first met you in the practice room.”

“What... oh yeah. I dunno, it makes me feel hopeful I guess.”  
  
“Implying you are currently hopeless.”

“Let’s just say my last school was not filled with the best people.”  
  
“Oh…” He could tell she wanted to inquire further but knew she had to wait until he was ready. He didn’t want to bog her down with his life before he’d met her. He wanted a fresh start.

The next day they went on a day trip to Brighton, an hour’s train journey away from their London university. They had disgusting sandwiches and crisps on the journey. He teased her dislike of train loos.

They meandered around a little, briefly going on the Pier and the beach before deciding on what to do. It was still cold enough for the temporary ice rink next to the Pavillion (the palace built by George IV and loathed by Queen Victoria) to still be open so they bought tickets and skated round and round. They both had poor balance and after 20 minutes of clutching the banisters they held each other’s gloved hand and wobbled around together.

It was wonderful fun until Fitz fell down, biting his tongue on the way, filling his mouth with blood. It hurt like hell and was horribly embarrassing. After spitting blood on the rink (leaving a horrible stain) they agreed that whilst enjoyable, ice skating was just too dangerous.   
  
“It wasn’t my fault! That child grabbed me.”  
  
“Sure Fitz, whatever you say. Well, we have some spare time now, you up for getting some hot chocolate?”  
  
“You read my mind.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting this as a test chapter. I've got another 3 or so chapters but I want to know if they'll be read so if you liked it please review? 
> 
> I spent a lot of time considering whether or not to type Fitz's accent but I decided against it in the end. 
> 
> On the chapter -  
> 1\. Jemma's hat is based off of mine.  
> 2\. The 2014 music is a thing done by London to accompany the New Years fireworks. There was indeed Kate Bush and Doctor Who (shout out to my dad for being nerdy enough to know it was the Optical cover).  
> 3\. THEY GO ON A DAY TRIP TO MY HOMETOWN. The ice rink is a real thing and I even changed the initial date they went so that they would go at a time it would have still been open.


	2. February (My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> February brings Valentine's day and a nasty reminder of the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is the acoustic My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark (Light Em Up) by Fall Out Boy. 
> 
> Also all my work is unbetaed so all mistakes and inaccuracies are my own.

February

“Oh… shite!”

“Jemma?”

“I’ve spelt February wrong again.”

“Explain.”

“I spent most of my life spelling it Feb-u-ary not Feb-ru-ary and didn’t realise my mistake until it was too late. Years of habit spelling it incorrectly.” She grumbled whilst vigorously rubbing the page with an eraser.

“Easily done though. I struggled with spelling favourite for years.”

Jemma let out a small ugly snort at this. It was the 4th and they were in his dorm doing theory revision, which they had recently spent more and more time doing together instead of apart.

Fitz marvelled at her ability to do ugly snorts and not have a stream of snot descend from her face. Yet another aspect in life where Jemma had it together and he didn’t.

They went back to their work but soon the silence got to him. Without really knowing it, he began to hum.

“Fitz!”

“Oh, sorry.”  
  
But five minutes later he was doing it again, the same song.

Jemma sighed, pushing aside her work. She recognised what he was humming, My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark (Light Em Up) by Fall Out Boy. Although it was irritating as she was trying to concentrate, she couldn’t really blame him. Music was in her bones too. So instead of stopping him again, she began to clap the beat.

Fitz looked up and grinned at her and began to sing the words. 

  
_Oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa._   
_B-B-B-Be careful making wishes in the dark, dark_

Suddenly the study session had become another ‘jam sesh’ as Skye called it. The song was a good one, alternative-rock and Simmons could tell it was one of Fitz’s favourites.

Soon his guitar was out and she was drumming with her fingers on whatever available surface she could reach, perfectly in sync.  

It vaguely occurred to Jemma during this song that moments like these were what life was about. Playing music with someone like Fitz. Feeling happy. It wasn’t a bad way to live.

Too soon, the song ended and someone in the dorm next door hammered at the wall and shouted ‘Quiet!’, so, giggling, they resumed revision and the moment was over.

Half an hour later, denting the studious silence, his phone chimed. He unlocked his phone to look at the message and… shit.

“Fitz, what’s wrong? You’ve gone all pale.” 

He fiddled nervously with the old ice rink band around his wrist that he still hadn’t removed.

“It’s uh… It’s an ex.”

“Oh.” Jemma fidgeted uncertainly. “From Scotland?”

“Yeah. She wants to meet up again.”

“That’s… nice.”

“No it’s really really not. She’s the _reason_ I moved.”

“Oh… Um. Do you want to talk about it?”

He closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead, smoothing out creases that weren’t there. Jemma felt awkward although she knew he must have exes, though he’d never mentioned them before. He was a very likable, wonderfully handsome and of course she wasn’t the only one to notice. It still felt like a shock though.

“I shouldn’t have gotten involved with her. She was controlling and manipulative and frankly scary so I left.”

_So light 'em up, up, up_   
_Light 'em up, up, up_

Poor Fitz. “She doesn’t know where you are, does she?”

“No no no. It’s fine, she’s nothing. Let’s stop talking about it.”

“Okay.”

They lapsed back into silence but it had shifted from comfortable to awkward and almost painful. Fitz was focused on the unhappy reminder of his past. He knew he would give Jemma the whole story one day. She had to be curious. And she was. A scary ex was certainly worrying but how psycho was this girl that Fitz had to move to another country, only a year into university, to get away from her?

When it was time for Jemma to leave, she rose and placed her hand on his shoulder.

“I hope it all turns out ok. Bye.”

“Bye. See you tomorrow?”

“Count on it.”

When they saw each other next no mentioned was made of anything unsavoury.

10 days later was Valentine’s Day. Neither was in a relationship of any kind and decided to spend the day together so they wouldn’t be lonely.

“Who-a-thon?”

“Who-a-thon.”

They watched a 4th Doctor story set in Victorian London and a smattering of Seven until they paused the DVD and realised they were hungry. Unfortunately for Fitz, Jemma’s cupboards contained only hot sauce and beer, the latter being Skye’s anyway.

“We could go out and get something to eat.”

“Nuh uh Jemma. You’ve seen how it is out there in the big wide world. Anatomically incorrect hearts everywhere. And it’ll be worse today. We can order in.”

“I refuse to get a takeaway for lunch. It’s just plain wrong. And anyway either you or Skye will make me have one for dinner and it’ll be twice in one day. I can’t afford it.”

“I’ll pay.”

“My other points still stand. And anyway we’re students Fitz, we have to budget. It’ll be way cheaper in the supermarket and there’s a co-op only a few streets away.”

“Fine but I want a takeaway for dinner.”

“Whatever makes you happy.”

They put on their coats, left the building and embarked on their food finding quest. Everything was normal until they reached the supermarket. There were vinyl heart stickers on the window and a display of various heart shaped chocolates. They both avoided the the flowers and confectionery and picked up supplies for cheese toasties with baked beans.

At the till, the thin lipped woman serving them eyed their meagre shopping.

“Hmmmm.” She breathed nasally. Fitz and Jemma eyed each other nervously.

“Good on you two.” She continued “I don’t believe in Valentine’s either. It’s nice to see a couple celebrate so… frugally.”

Fitz was stunned into silence. This aging bitter shop worker was talking to them and sending mixed messages. And she thought they were a couple?

_Oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, whoa._   
_In the dark, dark_

“Oh we’re not…” Jemma began but Fitz cut across.

“Aye well… we’re students and we haven’t been together that long so… Yeah.” He finished lamely and draped an arm around Jemma’s shoulders.

The till operator sniffed and finished ringing up their items.

They paid quickly and almost ran to the exit. Jemma was flustered and upset.

“Why did you say we were together?”

“I wanted to leave as quickly as possible.”

“But Fitz, I go there every week!”  
  
That upset him. Was the idea of people thinking they were together really so repulsive to her? Was she truly that embarrassed by him?

“I think I’d be a great pretend boyfriend.” Without meaning to, a trace of his offence trickled through.

“Look, don’t worry about it. We’re almost home now. Cheesy beanos and more Doctor Who, yeah?”

‘Home.’ he thought. It felt nice.

“Yeah.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know if I should post any more chapters!
> 
> Chapter Notes -   
> 1\. The spelling thing is from personal experience.   
> 2\. The Who episode is The Talons Of Weng Chiang.   
> 3\. Cheesy Beanos are delish! 
> 
> Thanks for reading :D


	3. March (Northern Downpour)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fitz is peaceful and a film night occurs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a little shorter than the last I think, so I'm sorry about that. The song for this chapter is Northern Downpour by Panic! At The Disco. I fully recommend listening to it. When I've finished this story I'll make a playlist of all the songs.

**March**

_Hey moon, please forget to fall down_   
_Hey moon, don't you go down_

It was dark and, for the city that never quietened, for a moment Fitz believed it was. He revelled in the silence, the potential for all. For someone who’s true love was music and noise he adored those rare moments of peace.

He was sat on a bench on a relatively secluded street, clutching a coffee in the dark. His breath was visible and he reminisced on pretending he was a dragon as a child in the winter. Soon the warm weather would come and Fitz anticipated it with a mixture of excitement and melancholy.

He’d come out here when he was particularly missing home. His mum, his friends. Maybe he’d have come to London even before things went haywire, it really was an excellent uni and a space had opened up for him. But he would have liked to have had the choice and not felt scared into leaving.

He looked up at the crescent moon and wondered if his mum was looking at it too. They stargazed together occasionally when he was little, though light pollution had worsened since then and moving to London hadn’t helped.

Would he go back if he could? Hm. Maybe not. He was actually happy here. Though the reason for that was -

“Fitz? What are you doing out here?” A figure called to him. It ran up to him from the other side of the street.

“Thinking? What are you doing here Jemma?”  
  
“We were going to watch Wizard of Oz together.” She said, waving the DVD case at him. “Did you forget?”

“That’s today? Right, right, let’s go.”

“It’s a good thing I saw you here or I’d have turned up at your dorm with it empty!”

He laughed with her and noticed she was wearing the same black bobble hat she had been when they’d first met. It was the one she used when her hair was greasy.

Fitz smiled again, to himself this time. Greasy hair meant she was comfortable around him. She didn’t mind him seeing her at weak moments. That was impressive, considering they’d only known each other a little over 2 months. Christ, was that all? It felt like much longer.

He got up and they walked the couple streets to his dorm. They’d arranged to watch The Wizard of Oz after he revealed that he hadn’t seen it since he was a little kid.

“But it’s a classic! And it contains some of the most famous music in the world!”

They entered their familiar routine, Fitz putting the DVD in his laptop and Jemma piling his duvet up into a back rest against the wall for them to lean on.

It felt cosy. And pleasantly domestic.

_I missed your skin when you were east_   
_You clicked your heels and wished for me_

She was still wearing her hat, even indoors. They sat on the improv sofa and she snuggled into the crook of his arm. He looped his arm around her shoulders as if he’d been doing it all his life.

The film began and he was lulled into a state of peace and drowsiness. He was half paying attention to the screen (Ding dong the witch is dead!) and to the pleasant warmth squished into his side. He could smell her hair from here.

He had never noticed the smell of anyone’s hair before but now it was an essential part of watching things with her. He couldn’t watch Doctor Who on his own without feeling a tad off kilter. Perhaps that was creepy. It didn’t feel it though. He wasn’t deliberately seeking out her hair stench and hoarding her shampoo or anything. It was just sort of… there.

Had she ever been this pleasantly warm before? Jemma was very sensitive to the temperature and she spent most of her life feeling cold. She did live in England after all. However, whenever she attempted to warm up it was incredibly easy to overheat and become uncomfortable.

But this was, as Goldilocks said, just right. The perfect temperature had been achieved and all she needed for it was a grumpy Scotsman.

Plus Fitz just smelt really really good. She could never tell him as it would border onto creepsville, but he just smelt intoxicating. Everything about him was just so wonderfully comfortable. She tried to concentrate on Judy Garland but her fuzzed and tired mind kept drifting to how dizzyingly pleasant he felt to be next to.  

112 minutes after it started, the film ended. Fitz stretched out his free arm and closed the laptop. It was only as he went to move his (now dead) arm from behind Jemma, that he noticed she was asleep; curled slightly into him.

He’d never seen her asleep until now. They didn’t have a habit of nodding off in each other’s presence. She was completely relaxed, even drooling on him a little. In that precious moment as he watched he unconsciously snuggle a little closer into his shirt, he knew that he wouldn’t go back to Scotland for the world.

He began to hum softly, a gentle tune he listened to when he was a tad melancholic.

_You are at the top of my lungs_   
_Drawn to the ones who never yawn_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know if you liked it :) 
> 
> I don't have any chapter notes for this one but in a fit of procrastination I did end up reading the whole Judy Garland wikipedia article.


	4. April (Alone Together)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fitz's birthday occurs and he and Jemma get drunk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I put Fitz and Jemma's birthdays in the story where they are best for the plot line, not based on any actual canon. The song for this month is Alone Together by Fall Out Boy.

April

Fitz had never been overly fond of his own birthday. He could be enthusiastic about other peoples but nothing good had ever happened on 20th April. He shared a birthday with Hitler, the most evil man to ever have lived. If he’d been born 4 days earlier he could have shared a birthday with Charlie Chaplin and if he’d been born 3 days later he would have shared a birthday with Shakespeare.

He hadn’t been planning to really celebrate his first birthday away from home. A quiet night in with Jemma was all he asked for. Unfortunately fate intervened.

If you could call Mack fate.

Mack was one of the first friends Fitz made upon his arrival to London. He was huge and friendly. They enjoyed bumming out to video games. As soon as Mack learnt of Fitz’s birthday plans he was distraught.

“That’s no way to spend your birthday!”

Two days later he announced to Fitz that he had planned a party for him. Mack shared a house with a bunch of friends and the party would be hosted there. It had all been arranged before Fitz could get out of it.

“It’s going to be so shit.” He complained to Jemma later. “I won’t know anyone. They’ll all just be there to get drunk. That’s not what I want to do on my birthday.”

“It sounds like you can’t get out of it. We could celebrate your birthday together the day before?”

“Alright but you have to come to this party with me.”

“Fitz, unlike you, some people like to leave the house.”

On the 19th Jemma came over bearing small paper party hats, the Seven Brides For Seven Brothers DVD and a present.

She insisted on watching the classic musical before he was aloud to open his present. It was a picture frame with a guitar on it and a picture of him and her placed inside.

“Obviously you can changed the picture but it’s my favourite of the two of us. So… Uh… Do you like it?”

It was a picture taken by Jemma’s room-mate Skye when they’d spontaneously played My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark whilst studying a couple months back. He didn’t even know this picture had been taken. He was sat on the floor with his guitar, singing, surrounded by papers and Jemma was sat at her desk clapping and providing backing vocals.

He could practically feel the music vibrating out the photo and they both looked so happy together.

“I love it. Of course I’m keeping this picture, it’s an amazing picture.”

She sighed happily and gave him a quick hug. Gently untangling himself, he placed the photo on his desk next to the one of him mum.

“Tomorrow’s going to be a pretty poor birthday in comparison to this one.”

“No matter what you say Mr. Grumpy I think you’ll enjoy yourself tomorrow.”

Fitz wasn’t sure about that but if she was having fun then a party really couldn’t be so bad.

The next day, his real birthday, was spent on a phone call with his mum and a quick excursion where, as a treat for himself, he bought a guitar he really couldn’t afford. It was a thing of beauty though.

The party didn’t start til eight but as the birthday boy Mack wanted him there at seven thirty. Fitz left the dorm at quarter past seven and headed over to Jemma’s dorm to pick her up. Skye would be going too but she was getting ready at her current boyfriend’s house.

He rang the doorbell and began to speak before the door opened.

“You know we could say we’re ill an-” He broke off speaking when he took in her appearance.

_You cut me off, I lost my track_   
_It’s not my fault I’m a maniac_

Was that? Jemma Simmons in a dress? For as long as he’d known her she’d always worn jumpers and shirts and jeans. They’d always dressed so alike that Fitz had forgotten that in actual fact he was friends with a girl who had different body parts to him.

Such as boobs.

He should stop staring.

“Come on Fitz, we’ve got to go! I spent ages getting ready. Let me get my coat, we can be on our way and maybe if we have time afterwards we can hang out.” With that she grabbed her coat off the rack and pulled him to the piss smelling stairs.

It wasn’t a particularly promiscuous dress. It was tight enough for a party and showed enough legs for a party.

She had really nice legs.

The navy blue looked really good against her skin.

He needed to snap out of this and fast. Fitz was sickened by how easy it was to think about his best friend in that way, like she was someone whom he was allowed to objectify. He shouldn’t think like that about strangers let alone his best friend. He was not some horny teenager.

He began to determinedly talk about school. Anything to get this over with.

They arrived at Mack’s house and his mind was taken over with the fresh horror of how much alcohol there was.

This night just got even worse.

_Say yeah (yeah!)_   
_Let’s be alone together (yeah)_

This night was so good! He was so drunk! Fitz wasn’t sure why he didn’t drink more often. He felt unstoppable.

Jemma was as drunk as he was, but this mostly just seemed to make her happy and sleepy. She was leant up against his right arm, gently dozing against his shoulder. Fitz dragged his left hand to her hair and clumsily patted it.

“Fiiitz. You smell so goooood.”

“You look really nice tonight. I love your dress.”

“Thank you.” She smiled, looking up at him. Their faces were so close… He leaned further in.

And the spell was broken as someone bustled past, bumping into them.

“Hey Fitzy I’m going to get another drink, kay?”

“I’ll be here.”   
  
_We could stay young forever (yeah)_  
 _Scream it from the top of your lungs, lungs, lungs_

He turned his head uneasily, squinting into the darkness. He was trying to find Jemma, it’d been a while since she’d left to get her drink. The song boomed in the background, vibrating in his ears.

God she was so great. He was overwhelmed with how great she was. He’d tell her as soon as she got back.

Hang on, there she was. She’d been backed into the wall by some bloke with ear stretchers Fitz didn’t recognise. She looked uncomfortable. The man had a hand on her thigh.

That was all Fitz registered before seeing red and blindly strolling up to them. The man was a lot taller than him and Fitz had to reach up to tap his shoulder.

The man turned around and as soon as he saw the smaller man he drew himself up even higher.

“Be a good lad and piss off yeah.”

“You’re making her uncomfortable.” Fitz was so blind drunk that he said the first thing on his mind without thinking. “Leave her alone, yeah?”

Using Fitz’s distraction wisely, Jemma slipped out from behind the brute trying to chat her up and went to stand behind Fitz. Before she made it to him, the man grasped her arm, halting her.

“Who’s gonna stop me? You, pipsqueak?”

“Actually.” A voice behind Fitz broke in. “I am.”

The party ended once Mack was finished beating the harasser to a pulp and Fitz made a mental note never to offend his usually good natured friend.

****  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know if you liked it! 
> 
> Chapter Notes -   
> 1\. I did a lot of research into birthdays in April.   
> 2\. Seven Brides For Seven Brothers is the bomb, just saying.   
> 3\. I looked up presents for musicians on google and found a nice guitar photo frame and that is what Jemma got Fitz.   
> 4\. I have never been drunk before so this was just based off of things I've read.


	5. May (Everybody Talks)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jemma is stressed and has a birthday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this month is Everybody Talks by Neon Trees which is truly BRILLIANT. I'm not sure when Uni exams are in the year so let's pretend they're in June shall we?

**May**

_Oh my my shit_   
_Everybody talks, everybody talks_

The pressure was rising. Exams were fast approaching and more and more revision and practice was required. Jemma was feeling it more than most. Fitz was afraid his normally calm and collected friend would boil over. He’d never seen her so stressed.

He tried to get her to rest and take days off but it was like persuading a velociraptor to wear a dress. She just couldn’t comprehend the idea. Just as he’d predicted to himself every all nighter and missed day out, she soon broke.

It all came to head one day in the practice rooms as Fitz tried to help her perfect her exam song. Jemma had a habit of choosing songs she was passionate about and not ones suited to her voice and it was very hard to find one that was a happy medium.

She’d picked one of her favourite songs, which she could sing well but was entirely unsuited to her range. It would also be accompanied with piano, an instrument that did not suit the song well.

“Listen Jemma, you know as well as I should that you should change the song.”

“It’s not the song that’s the problem, it’s me!” She slumped down onto a chair and gazed at him miserably.

“Come again?”

“I hate my range. All my life my singing instructors are always trying to get me to do pop stuff, because they’re the only thing I’m really good at. I envy your versatile voice Fitz, you can sing whatever you wish whilst I’m stuck in a genre I’m passive about.” She unintentionally pouted a little.

Fitz pitied her, but knew that whilst restrained, her voice was truly stunning.

“After these exams you can sing whatever you want. I know how much you like doing songs you care about but maybe just this once you’ll have to stick to your strengths.”

“I know, I know. I don’t have to like it though. Help me pick a new song?”

“Of course.” He thought that the matter was done, until she suddenly burst into tears.

“Hey hey hey.” He knelt in front of her chair and placed his hand on her cheek. “Shh Jemma don’t cry, it’s ok, it’s ok.”  
  
“Urgh I’m sorry.” She sniffed and leaned into his hand. “I can’t do this.”

“Your exams? Course you can. But not at this pace. You need a day off. I wasn’t supposed to tell you this but I think it’ll cheer you up. You know how it’s your birthday tomorrow?”

“It is?”

“Ye- Jeez Jems when did you last look at the date? So anyway, Mack’s planned a surprise party for you at his seeing as you seemed to enjoy mine. Tomorrow we’ll go out and then have a fun time at Mack’s and no studying is allowed, got it?”

Their faces were very close now. He could taste her breath on his lips.

“Thank you Fitz.” She whispered.   
  
_It started with a whisper_  
 _And that was when I kissed her._

She had such beautiful eyes. His face instinctively gravitated to hers, drawing him yet nearer. The moment was intimate and delicate and intricate. It was so very precious.

Then her phone chirruped annoyingly and reality crashed back onto him. He jerked away and then stood up. She yanked out her phone and scrambled to check it.

“It’s only O2.”

What had he been doing? He was not allowed to kiss his best friend! Poor Jemma, she’d been upset and all he’d done was shoved his great fat head up at her.

Fitz quickly excused himself and almost ran back to his dorm. He’d never be able to go into that music room ever again.

The next day he showed up at her door with birthday coffee and his guitar.

“Fitz? It’s 9am! You’re lucky Skye’s out or she’d have murdered you.”

“It’s your birthday Jemma! Come on, get dressed, we’re going to have a fun day.”

“Oh yeah. Birthday.”

“You’re hopeless.”

A cup of coffee and a fresh outfit later and Jemma seemed more herself.

“Where’s my present? I got you one. Come on Fitz!”

“Ah actually I did get you a present but its not… Okay I was thinking about what to get you but you pretty much have everything you want and I didn’t want to just get you some clutter so…” He gestured to his guitar. “I wrote you a song.”

“Oh Fitz!”

And then he began playing, a beautiful song about the feeling of 1am and the sound of coffee and a girl who wrote music just by being. It was a song about the taste of ink and best friend that there ever was who was made of star light. By the end Jemma was crying. She gave him a fierce hug and Fitz grinned into her shoulder.

“It’s wonderful Fitz. I’ll write a song about you too.”

“But it’s already been my birthday.” 

“Oh shush.” She pulled away from the hug. “Where are we going today anyway?”

“Well obviously it’s your birthday but I have a couple ideas.”

“I’m open to anything. I haven’t had any time to myself in so long!”

“I was wondering if you would be open to seeing this Sherlock Holmes exhibit?”

“I’ve heard about that, but I didn’t think I’d get to see it. Come on, we can get there by tube!” She made to move, her old bustling self once again.

Still grinning so hard it hurt, Fitz allowed himself to be lead out of the door and into the open.

_Hey baby, what ya gotta say?_   
_All you’re giving me is fiction._

They spent the whole day in their fictional world where anything was real and it was magical. Jemma’s eyes shone with excitement and Fitz prided himself with the knowledge that he had been the one to make her this happy.

Too soon they had to head back. Jemma insisted on getting ready for the party, even though it was still technically meant to be a surprise.

As he waited outside, Fitz was able to prepare himself for her party clothes and this time when she opened the bedroom door he greeted her less like a goldfish and more like a gentleman.

The party was already in full swing by the time they arrived and they were received by an already drunk Mack who assured them that the douchebag from Fitz’s birthday would not be coming. They made for the alcohol.

_Take me to your love shack_   
_Mamas always gotta backtrack_

His hand was on her waist. Her hand brushed his thigh. His hand was on her waist. Her hand brushed his -

“Fitz!”

His hand-

“Fitz your phone went off!”

Jemma was shouting. Phone phone phone. He fumbled for it, still maintaining his hand on her waist. They were in an empty corner of a room, though he wasn’t sure which one, but there was still enough noise to cover the shrill of his text alert.

Who was texting him at this time?

Shite.

“Beth? Who’s Beth?” She’d seen the caller ID.

“Ex from hell.” He shoved the phone back in his pocket, suddenly heavier, and leaned against the wall.

“Wha- oh. Her.” She grew darker and sadder in the same instant.

“I was just so lonely and when someone started to show an interest…” He began to explain.

“You don’t need to tell me, it’s fine.”

“But I want to! She made me cut my hair and change my clothes to suit her.”

“You’re drunk.”

“She looked at my phone and didn’t let me talk to other girls.”

“Maybe you should tell me when we’re sober.”

“She isolated me from the only friend I had. She made me think my mum hated me.”

“Oh Fitz…”

“She hit me Jemma.”

“Fitz…” He looked down and there were tears in her eyes. “It’s… It’s ok she can’t get to you here.”

“I know, I know.”

“Thank you for telling me though. Why don’t you block her number?”

“Wouldn’t make a difference, she’d just use a pay phone to try and call me. I like to have warning when it’s her who’s calling.”

“I understand why you moved now. I’m so glad you had the courage to remove yourself from that kind of relationship.”

“Me too.”

“Plus then you got to meet me, which is always a bonus.” She joked weakly.

The tears made her eyes shine. He thought of the song he wrote and how true it was. The girl made of star light, who wrote music just by being. Part person, part waterfall. He’d never thought he would ever have the privilege of having a friend like her. Let alone a best friend.

“Yeah.” He whispered. “Yeah it was.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know if you liked it!
> 
> Chapter Notes -   
> 1\. Me and Jemma are on the same phone network because I say so.   
> 2\. I've heard about a Sherlock Holmes exhibit in London but I haven't been to see it, hence no details.   
> 3\. No offence to anyone called Beth! It was the first name to pop in my head.   
> 4\. MOST IMPORTANTLY - If the details of Fitz's relationship sound like yours, then please tell someone.


	6. June (I'd Do Anything)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jemma contemplates her future and falls seriously ill late at night. 
> 
> The chapter song is I'd Do Anything by Simple Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long to write but it ended up super long! Tw: Hospital

** June **

_Another day is going by_   
_I’m thinking about you all the time_

“I’ll call you some other time. Tomorrow?”

…

“Of course I know what today is!” He said, glancing at the date on his phone. “The 29th June, it’s your birthday.”

...

“I did not forget. Look mum, I got to go. Jemma’s here.”

...

“No mum, she’s not my girlfriend.”

...

“No you can’t talk to her!”

...

“You’ll say something embarrassing.”

...

“Yes you will.”

...

“I do have other friends.”

...

“Love you too mum, speak later. Bye.”

Fitz hung up the phone and dropped it onto the sofa cushions next to him. Jemma was on his left, laughing uproariously.

“What’s so funny?”

“I want to talk to your mum! She can tell me baby stories.” She giggled again.

“Certainly not.” Great, now they were both teasing him. He knew he shouldn’t have picked up the phone with Jemma next to him.

“Do you tell your mum about me? Do you talk about me aaaaaall of the time?”

“Don’t be stupid.”

“That’s what it sounded like.”

He did talk about her quite a bit but she didn’t need to know that. He needed to change to subject and fast.

“So how did your exam go?” She’d eventually settled on some pop song that was in the top 40 at the moment. It suited her voice well and she didn’t dislike it, so there was that.

“Oh it went well.” She tried to sound certain but Fitz could sense there was something more.

“But…” He trailed off, trying to prompt her further,

“I think it went too well.”

This was not the answer Fitz was expecting.

“How could it have gone too well? When have you ever not wanted an exam to go well?” He asked incredulously, turning towards her on the sofa.

“My examiner wanted to send a recording of me singing to one of his contacts in the industry.”

Fitz’s mouth gaped open in shock, like a goldfish. He was silent for a few moments before speaking.

“Jem… Wow, that’s great! Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“I’m not sure how I feel about it. If this works out I could have a career in music, which I’ve always wanted. But I’d just be doing the same stuff over and over in a genre I’m not passionate about.”

“But this is a long shot right? These people in the industry probably receive thousands of recordings a day.”

“Actually… They want me to come in for an audition.”

“Woah…”

“Should I do it?” She seemed genuinely concerned about his answer, his opinion.

“I mean… You might as well give it a shot. If they make you an offer, you can always refuse.”

“Yeah, that makes sense. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. I was just freaking out I suppose. If it helps, I haven’t told anyone else either.”

“Not even your parents?” He asked incredulously.

“They wouldn’t understand. They think all music’s the same.”

“I get that too.” His mum was sweet, bless her, but she got confused

“I’ll do the audition and if nothing comes of it I’m no worse off.”

“Right.”

“Thanks Fitz.” She leaned over and enveloped him in a hug. “Thanks for being my friend.”

“Any time.” He whispered into her hair.

_I’ll be here_  
 _I’ll be waiting_

Later that night, after he'd returned home, Fitz was awoken by his mobile. It rang, playing an obnoxiously happy song that he’d only programmed in for two people. His mum… and Jemma.

His first thought that his mum wanted to have the conversation she’d been denied earlier. Although what she was doing calling him at 2am, he had no idea.

Blearily he grasped the phone and checked the caller ID. It was Jemma. He had to read it twice to check it was definitely her. She was someone who believed in receiving enough sleep. A fact he’d been reminded of several times when he’d had an idea he wanted to share late at night.

He swiped the phone to answer the call.

“Jemma? I was asleep.”

A series of short sharp breaths answered him.

“Fitz? I can’t- I can’t breathe.” She sounded distressed and had trouble getting her words out. Immediately he was wide awake.

“Hang on, I’m on my way. Is there anything else wrong? Try not to say too much.” He lept off the bed and grabbed his shoes, keeping the phone to his ear at all times.

“I started to get a headache. Then I was dizzy. I was- I was sick.” She sounded like she might be crying.

“Do you have any idea what it could be? Did you eat something funny?” He replied urgently. Shoes only half on and still in his pajamas, he dashed through the door. A thought occurred to him and he rushed back for his wallet.

“Can’t be food poi-” A series of hacking coughs cut her off “Poisoning. No fever.”

“Oh god, ok ok. Um.” He was racing down the stairs, fumbling his words. “I’m going to call an ambulance.”

“Please don’t hang up.” Her pleading voice pierced his heart.

_I’d do anything_  
 _Just to hold you in my arms_

“I’ve got to Jems. I’ll call you back as soon as I’m finished but I’ve got to. I’ll be there before you know it. Taxi!” The last was aimed not at her but at a cab cruising past him. He flagged it down and opened the back door.

“Sorry mate, I’m about to clock off.”

“Please, my friend’s ill. It’s not that far.”

“Alright then. Where to?” The taxi driver tried to give him a kindly look from behind his silver rimmed spectacles but Fitz hardly noticed as he gave him her address.

He held the phone back up to his ear.

“I’m on my way. I’ll be there soon.”  
  
“Hurry.” She whispered hoarsely.

It pained him to hang up but he did and for the first time in his life he dialled 999.

“Hello, emergency service operator, which service do you require?” It’s was a woman’s voice, robotic and monotonous from repeating the same thing day in and day out.

“Ah, ambulance.”

“I’ll just connect you now.” A click. And then he was through.

“Hello, what is the nature of your emergency?” A man with a airy voice asked.

“I’ve just had a call from my friend, she said she can’t breathe properly. It sounded serious.” His hand was starting to tremble.

“Can you give me her address?”

Fitz struggled to give it as clearly and yet as quickly as he could but he managed to recite it without making a mistake.

“An ambulance is on it’s way. Can you give me any other symptoms?”

“She said she had a headache and was feeling dizzy but she didn’t think it was food poisoning because she didn’t have a fever. Oh, and she was sick.” The taxi was about half way from her dorm now.

“Thank you.” He could hear clicking. “Ok, my database is telling me we’ve just had a few other calls to that address with similar symptoms.”

“Is it some kind of disease?” His face went pale. This sounded bad.

“Based on the symptoms it sounds like carbon monoxide poisoning. The police are on their way to evacuate the building. Sir, this is important, did your friend pass out?” Fitz felt like he was going to be sick. He’d heard stories about carbon monoxide killing campers as they slept.

“I have to call her.” Without waiting for a response he hung up and dialled Jemma.

“Come on, come on. Pick up.” He muttered to himself, staring out the window, trying to gauge how far away he was.

To his immense relief, she did.

“Jemma! You have to get out of there!”

“I don’t...” She sounded weak.

“The ambulance is on it’s way but there have been more calls from your building. They reckon it’s carbon monoxide poisoning. You have to get outside!”

“Ok. Stay- Stay on the phone.”

The car drew up.

“I will but I’m at your building now anyway. I’m coming up.” He scrambled for his wallet, which he’d placed beside him due to the absence of pockets. Her voice drifted out the phone as he tried to get out some cash to pay for the cab.

“No… Not if there’s a leak.” He barely heard her. As he tried to pay, the driver waved away his money.

“Go lad, quick!”

Fitz scrambled to leave, calling a thank you over his shoulder. There were no ambulances there yet, although they couldn’t be far. Jemma’s weak protests still wavered from his phone. He dashed up the stairs and found her a flight down from her floor.

She was in her pajamas like him, although hers smelt of sick. She was sat on a stair, though grasping the banister, trying to get up. She looked as if she could fall unconcious any minute.

“Fitz no.” She tried weakly to bat him away, to make him leave this potential gas zone. They couldn’t know where carbon monoxide had leaked and where it hadn’t.

Instead of heeding her wishes, he knelt down and scooped her up.

“Come on, we need to get out.” He began to take the stairs, hurrying as much he could whilst carrying another person. He wished he’d gone to the gym more, lifted weights or something. She felt fragile and small, but then so was he.

Still he made it down the stairs just as the first ambulance drew up.

_I’d do anything_   
_Just to fall asleep with you_

The next day (although technically it was the same day) after Fitz had nipped home to put on clothes, he visited her in hospital.

She was going to be fine.

He brought his laptop to her hospital room to try and cheer her up. Her neighbour had died in the leak. Luckily though the leak only occurred on Jemma’s floor and not the whole building but it still hurt.

“What would you like to watch?”

“Anything. Something happy.” She still sounded wheezy. “I’m so tired Fitz. Aren’t you tired?”

“I’m running on adrenaline. You go to sleep. I’ll be here.”

He placed the laptop on her bed and a Scooby Doo episode began to play. She was lulled by the colourful nostalgia and began to fall asleep as Shaggy and Scooby were chased around to a Simple Plan track. Her eyes fluttered shut and he closed the laptop and removed it from her bed. Almost without realising it, he began to hum a soft tune. It seemed to soothe her and whilst she slept, he basked in the knowledge that she was alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know if you liked it :) 
> 
> I know nothing about carbon monoxide poisoning other than what I've read online so there'll be wrong bits there. 
> 
> Chapter Notes -  
> 1\. I put it so far back in the month so that I could have the direct repercussions of this event happen in the next chapter, to break it up a bit. Who knows what they spent the rest of the month doing.  
> 2\. Fitz is a wonderful son but he can be a bit forgetful. I'm sure he made it up to her somehow.  
> 3\. I actually googled '999 call script' to find the sort of things operators say.  
> 4\. The first time I heard the song this chapter's based on it was on a Scooby Doo episode so I included that. It was hard finding good lyrics from the song for this chapter because the song's more about someone lost or broken up with.


	7. July (Chasing Cars)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fitz and Jemma visit Hampton Court. Shameless fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter song is Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol.

The next day Jemma was allowed to leave the hospital but not to go home. The leak was still being investigated and all traces of carbon monoxide were being removed. The police were able to find her temporary accommodation but Fitz immediately put his foot down.

“You can’t live in a strange hotel after going through all of that. You can come and stay with me Jemma. For as long as you need.” He gave her no room to refuse.

So he borrowed an air mattress from Mack and took the floor, giving her the bed.

Exams were finally over and school was winding down. Everyone was more relaxed and ready to laugh. It had finally stopped raining (mostly) and the sun was putting in an appearance most days.

Initially she still needed a bit of looking after so Fitz spoiled her with food and films. It was like a sleepover that didn’t end. They’d stay up late at night talking like teenages and giggling like ten year olds.

As soon as Fitz was sure that Jemma was completely recovered from the gas he began to take her out more often, in an attempt to take her mind off it.

Sometimes they just wandered around and sometimes Fitz planned specific days out.

The best day was the day he took her to Hampton Court and he watched her marvel at the tapestries and the paintings.

_I don’t quite know_   
_How to say_   
_How I feel_

She’d tug his sleeve every time she wanted him to take in some fact she was telling him, which was often.

“I mean she was dead when he had this commissioned, that’s so gruesome!”

He wasn’t looking at the picture of Henry VIII and Jane Seymour. He was watching her eyes light up and her hands gesticulate wildly.

She’d always been fond of history and would often tell him weird facts she’d gleaned from some documentary she’d seen.

They wandered through the Tudor and Baroque style halves of the palace, drinking in the magnificence, when they decided to stop for a late lunch. Fitz had packed a picnic of sandwiches and crisps and drinks as the cafe was a tad understocked.

_Those three words_   
_Are said too much_   
_They’re not enough_

They sat in the magnificent gardens and began to munch on the food whilst gazing around them. Jemma’s eyes followed a blonde woman in bob who was talking to a film crew.

“Do I recognise her?”

“She’s probably filming some documentary Jems.”

He was still watching Jemma. How long had he been doing that? Months probably.

He still hadn’t named his feelings but he had finally accepted they were there. That ache in his belly, like he’d swallowed a magnet that was permanently attracted to her.

A stray curl of wind reached out and picked some of her hair. It played with it, twirling it between it’s wispy tendrils. Fitz watched in awe. He had to sit on his hands to stop himself from tucking it behind her ears.

_If I lay here_   
_If I just lay here_   
_Would you lie with me and just forget the world?_

He hadn’t brought a picnic blanket so when he lay back on the ground, the dewy grass soaked into his shirt. He was rewarded with the expanse of the sky, dotted with a couple clouds and lit up by the sun. Fitz brought his hands up under his head to cushion himself and stop the grass stalks from pricking his ears.

She was still in his peripheral vision even now. And then suddenly she wasn’t.

He could feel her pressed next to him, so she must have laid down too. He craned his neck to see her laid down, eyes shut and resting her hands on her stomach. He smiled to himself and put his head back down.

“This is nice.” She whispered.

“Yeah.” He agreed hoarsely.

The food lay abandoned next to them.

His jeans were sticking to his legs now. Her elbow kissed his waist and her head was resting on his arm. He joined her in closing his eyes and drunk in the sensations.

He wanted to remember this exact moment for the rest of his life. When he was eighty and he had forgotten what it was like to have hair and had lost most of his motor functions he still wanted to remember this exact moment with complete clarity.

Because in this moment everything was perfect.

_Let’s waste time_   
_Chasing cars_   
_Around our heads_

They were surrounded by dead people in this five hundred year old palace and that seemed to put everything in perspective. School and stress couldn’t reach them here.

It occurred to Fitz that Jemma was probably not thinking these things. She was probably enjoying the sun on her face and the grass under her back but she was perhaps not feeling the poetry of the situation.

The warmth by his side had gone, he noticed a few moments later. Or perhaps it had been more than that as the sky was darker.

Jemma had sat up and was packing away the things they had left out.

“We must have nodded off!” She was saying. “We’d better go, it’ll be closing soon. Oh, we didn’t get to go to the maze!”

Fitz sat up, joints popping in protest, and groaned. The gardens were significantly emptier, only a few stragglers remained.

“We can come again.” He said, stretching his arms and moving to stand up. She was already stood up, his backpack slung over her shoulder.

“We didn’t get to go to the giftshop either.” She said, not mollified by his promise.

He didn’t reply because she was shivering. She didn’t have a jacket and neither did he for that matter. The air had chilled whilst they were sleeping.

He started to unbutton his shirt.

“Fitz this really isn’t the time for stripping!” She said, alarmed. Wordlessly, he shrugged off his shirt and handed it to her, relieved that he had worn a t-shirt under it. When she didn’t take it he pushed it into her hands.

“You’re cold.” He said by way of explanation.

“But so will you be if you’ve only got a t-shirt on.” Still, she took off the backpack and pulled it on over her band shirt. His shirt was still a tad damp but was still warm and cozy. She pulled it tighter around herself and snuggled in.

“Come on Jemma. Let’s go home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This didn't have much of a plot OH WELL. 
> 
> If you liked it let me know :)
> 
> Chapter Notes -   
> 1\. Hampton Court is my favourite place of all time of course I made them go there.   
> 2\. You DO recognise that woman Jemma, she's Lucy Worsley the historian. (I've read all her books, seen all her documentaries and seen her do a talk. She is awesome)   
> 3\. I know it's set in July but trust me it does get cold at night here, even in the summer.


	8. August (Your Song)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blarg sorry I should have updated sooner. 
> 
> This month's song is Your Song by Elton John. As soon as I finish this fic I'll make a playlist of all the songs on 8tracks.

**August**

_It’s a little bit funny this feeling inside_   
_And not one of those you can easily hide_

School had finally broken up for summer, just as Jemma was free to move back to her dorm. A few days after that she was off the Sheffield to visit her family.

Fitz too wanted to visit his mum, especially as he had been avoiding Scotland. But he finally felt brave enough to risk bumping into his ex and went on a quick visit.

As a result the pair didn’t see each other for a few weeks, the most they’d been apart since they’d met. Every evening they had a long Skype call and throughout the days they exchanged numerous texts.

Their parents teased them and asked when the wedding was. Jemma was able to speechlessly shake her head whereas Fitz would duck his red face and mumble incoherently.

Finally they both returned to London.

Fitz returned a couple days before Jemma and spent them wandering the city, feeling a tad alone and lost.

There were places he could have gone to and people he could have seen but he didn’t want to on his own. He wanted to do it all with her.

After what felt like an age, she returned. She went to his flat as soon as she’d dropped off her bags. Fitz wasn’t expecting to see her until the next day so when he answered his door to his tiny tired friend he wrapped her in a hug before she’d even said hello.

“This is a nice greeting.” She said, her words muffled by his shirt. “Hello!”

“I’ve missed you.” He breathed excitedly.

“Missed you too. Let me sit down, I’ve been travelling all day.” The journey from Sheffield to London wasn’t too long but had, he later found out, been hampered by delayed trains.

“Right, course, sorry.” He shot away to let her flop on his bed. “I don’t want to seem like I’m not please to see you, because I am, but why are you here?”

“I dropped my bags off at my dorm and I was going to take a nap but I wanted to see you as soon as possible.” She said dozily. Fitz’s face split open into a wide grin.

“You want some coffee? I know it’s only the afternoon, but you look like you need it.”

“Oh God yes.”

He turned into his weeny kitchenette, put on the kettle and grabbed the coffee pot.

“I’d ask you how your visit was.” He said. “But I’m not sure there’s anything about it you haven’t already told me.”

She sleepily mumbled to the affirmative.

Fitz made the coffee quietly to give her a chance to get forty winks before they started talking. But when he re-entered his bedroom she wasn’t just resting her eyes. She had fallen dead asleep on his bed.

He smiled, put the coffee down, crept up to her and knelt down.

_So excuse me for forgetting but these things I do_   
_You see I’ve forgotten if they’re green or they’re blue_

Her mouth was open wide and drooling a tad. She had bags under her eyes. He couldn’t wake her now, not when she needed shut eye so much. He sat down properly and lent on the wall. He closed his eyes and took in the sound of her breathing.

Christ, it hit him, he hadn’t even know her a year. They’d been friends less than 8 months and yet he already thought that her gentle breaths were sweeter than any music he’d ever heard.

Fitz’s eyes flew open. This was more than friendship.

Before he could think anymore she twitched and then furrowed her brow with a groan. Shit, he didn’t want her to wake up yet. Panicking slightly, he began to hum. Her face visibly relaxed so he continued, whisper-singing so as not to wake her.

_Anyway the thing is what I really mean_   
_Yours are the sweetest eyes I’ve ever seen_

It took a moment for Fitz to realise he was singing one of his favourite love songs. He wondered when this had become his default song for Jemma, if it was his Freudian slip.

Absent mindedly he reached out and caressed her hand which was curled next to her face. Without thinking he began drawing circles amongst her knuckles. He focused on a small freckle on her ring finger.

Crap. Crappity shit. He was in love with her wasn’t he?

Oh bugger.

This could ruin everything and the worst part was he didn’t seem to care. The butterflies in his stomach that swooped whenever he saw her could destroy their friendship.

Fuck.

~~~

Jemma awoke to the sun pulling her eyelids open. Her neck clicked and she realised she’d probably been in that position all night.

She focused her eyes and Fitz swam into her vision in front of her. He was asleep sat up, leant on the wall. It could hardly be comfortable. But then, she remembered, she had nicked his bed and guilt settled in her stomach.

“Fitz.” She whispered. He did not stir. “Fitz.” She stage whispered and it did the trick. His eyes dragged open.

“Jeez what time is it?”

“Uh, I dunno. Early I think. Do you want the bed?”

“Nah you keep it.”

“What I meant to say was, get in the bed.”

He groaned and grumbled but allowed himself to be lead up and onto the single. Jemma cuddled into him and drifted off again. As she floated into unconsciousness she could have sworn she’d heard him singing to himself. Or perhaps to her.

_I hope you don’t mind that I put down in words_   
_How wonderful life is now you’re in the world_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, if you liked it let me know :)
> 
> Chapter Notes -  
> 1\. Pretty much the whole point of this chapter is Fitz realising he'd in love. I'm sorry that much else happens.  
> 2\. Also the rest of the summer holidays was pretty uneventful I guess.


End file.
